Today-- Deutoronomy 1 &2--- Do not fear & Trust

Third Day's Song:

You are beautiful my sweet, sweet song
You are beautiful my sweet, sweet song
You are beautiful my sweet, sweet song
And I will sing again

You are so good to me
You heal my broken heart
You are my Father in Heaven (2x)

You are beautiful my sweet, sweet song
You are beautiful my sweet, sweet song

You ride upon the clouds
You lead me to the truth
You are the Spirit inside me

Today I read through Deuteronomy 1 & 2.  I have never had a desire to read Deut. before but today the Holy Spirit lead me there.  The is told by Moses & ultimately is about the Israelites unbelief and lack of trust in God.  Because of this unbelief, they did not obey the Lord's commandment to go

"But you were unwilling to go up; you rebelled against the command of the LORD your God. ²⁷ You grumbled in your tents and said, “The LORD hates us; so he brought us out of Egypt to deliver us into the hands of the Amorites to destroy us. ²⁸ Where can we go? Our brothers have made our hearts melt in fear. They say, ‘The people are stronger and taller than we are; the cities are large, with walls up to the sky. We even saw the Anakites there.’”
 ²⁹ Then I said to you, “Do not be terrified; do not be afraid of them. ³⁰ The LORD your God, who is going before you, will fight for you, as he did for you in Egypt, before your very eyes, ³¹ and in the wilderness. There you saw how the LORD your God carried you, as a father carries his son, all the way you went until you reached this place.” 

 ³² In spite of this, you did not trust in the LORD your God, ³³ who went ahead of you on your journey, in fire by night and in a cloud by day, to search out places for you to camp and to show you the way you should go."

They saw the Anakites were "stronger and taller" than they (v. 28) and disobeyed God's command.
There root of their sin was unbelief.  A lack of faith. Distrust.
When they then realized that they were wrong, (v. 41) and tired to go on their OWN strength, they failed miserably. 

^41" Then you replied, “We have sinned against the LORD. We will go up and fight, as the LORD our God commanded us.” So every one of you put on his weapons, thinking it easy to go up into the hill country.  ⁴² But the LORD said to me, “Tell them, ‘Do not go up and fight, because I will not be with you. You will be defeated by your enemies.’”
 ⁴³ So I told you, but you would not listen. You rebelled against the LORD’s command and in your arrogance you marched up into the hill country. ⁴⁴ The Amorites who lived in those hills came out against you; they chased you like a swarm of bees and beat you down from Seir all the way to Hormah. ⁴⁵ You came back and wept before the LORD, but he paid no attention to your weeping and turned a deaf ear to you. ⁴⁶ And so you stayed in Kadesh many days—all the time you spent there. "

They wept and complained & "whoa as me..." and they were beaten down from Seir.. chased like a swarm of bees!!  (v. 41 & 44).  God turned His ear then from them... much like a gentle parent would do when their child does not obey.. as if to say " I told you not to "____."  That's what happens when you "_________."  Like a good parent, God let them suffer the natural consequences of their disobedience, rebellion & lack of trust in Him.  And like ignorant children, the Israelites had to learn the lesson the "hard way."  They were then sent into the desert for 40 days.

How often do we do this?  We don't trust the Lord enough.  I am so guilty of trying to control things on my own, only to look back and see.. oh yeah if I would have just...
The good news is there is Grace.  The Lord did not forsake His children the Israelites, instead He provided all their needs for the 40 days in the desert.  He was with them anyways and blessed them. (Deut 2, v. 7)

The lesson here to be learned is to trust in Him.  To pray for increased faith and He will provide.
 ⁵ Trust in the LORD with all your heart
   and lean not on your own understanding;
⁶ in all your ways submit to him,
   and he will make your paths straight.^[a]
Proverbs 3:5-6

We can't do things on our strength, nor can we obsess about what the future holds of try on our own to KNOW His will.  He may not want us to know His will.  Our commandments are  to Trust in Him, to Love Him with all our hearts & souls & minds, and to love & serve are neighboors (enemies, roommates, friends, etc) as ourselves.  All we can do today is seek righteousness (Matt. 6:33)and to walk worthy today and obey Him today.  For tomorrow will bring it's own glory & trials.
For Christ said, according to the Gospel of Matthew
  

 " ²⁵ “Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more than food, and the body more than clothes? ²⁶ Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they? ²⁷ Can any one of you by worrying add a single hour to your life^[e]?
   ²⁸ “And why do you worry about clothes? See how the flowers of the field grow. They do not labor or spin. ²⁹ Yet I tell you that not even Solomon in all his splendor was dressed like one of these. ³⁰ If that is how God clothes the grass of the field, which is here today and tomorrow is thrown into the fire, will he not much more clothe you—you of little faith? ³¹ So do not worry, saying, ‘What shall we eat?’ or ‘What shall we drink?’ or ‘What shall we wear?’ ³² For the pagans run after all these things, and your heavenly Father knows that you need them. ³³ But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well. ³⁴ Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own. "

Love your sister,
Katherine

Isaiah 43-- Oh How He Loves Us for His Name's Sake

God has been teaching me sooo so so much lately that I feel that I can't even process it; let alone blog it, but hopefully this will help me do so; encourage you; and most of all Glorify His Name.

Where to start? It's the most wonderful time of the year.. (YES it should be!) but for mothers-- this season brings stress.. to prepare for the holidays.  For the employed , there are end of the year deadlines to meet; for many Pastors the desire to have fruitful ministry and share the Gospel with  as people's hearts as possible so that they may be warmed by Jesus' Birth; and for students... final papers, deadlines, finals, stress..  and for me the reality of graduating in 5 months.

Yesterday this reality caused me great anxiety.  I am often paralyzed with dreading to do this or that or overwhelmed by the endless checklist.  We all want God's help, we all want His wisdom.. His will to be done.. but often, if you are like me, it is very much out of selfish ambition.  We want all these things so that we can "feel" happy and to be comfortable.. many times for things to "turn-out" of our own glory & not His.  We essentially-- in the American culture--  want and expect Heaven here on earth.  

Yesterday the Lord opened my eyes to this harsh reality.  I woke-up so depressed, so overwhelmed.  I had a 8 page research paper to write-- and my laptop would NOT work; a ton of other homework.. yada yada yada... it was raining out... I didn't want to shower,  I didn't want to eat; I didn't want to move,  to get up to listen to God.  I wanted to dwell in my emotions; my self-pity... YUCK

After much battle, I got-up and went to help make church bags and write my paper--

long story short the Lord pulled me through.  He once again showed me that I am not of this world and that His will and plan are not for always for me to know .  That being a Christian does not mean not struggling with anxiety, or stress or depression, but combating those thoughts with the TRUTH.  The truth of His Love and the fullness of the Holy Spirit. 

     Rejoice in the Lord always; again I will say, rejoice. Let your reasonableness be known to everyone. The Lord is at hand; do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.
    Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is commendable, if there is any excellence, if there is anything worthy of praise, think about these things. What you have learned and received and heard and seen in me—practice these things, and the God of peace will be with you.
(Philippians 4:4-9 ESV)

That He loves me for HIS sake and His Mercy is for Him and His Glory and that He does love me, but because of who He is not because of anything that I do or don't do.

All will pass and the Lord will remain.  Paper deadlines will pass and so will the grades.  God is good all the time. (Ecclesiastes)
  This world in not our home for those that have accepted the gift of eternal life by the Sacrifice of Christ on the Cross.  That He lives and moves and will always remain and that those who have put their whole life and trust and faith in Him will never be put to shame.  That Christ's blood and body that was shred for us covers all our sins yesterday, today and tomorrow and that we are completely Justified and made right in His Eyes.  For while we were still sinners, Christ died for us (Romans 5:8) and There is therefore now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus. (Romans 8:1) that whoever believes in Him and puts their trust in Him has Eternal Life (John 3:16).  For it was written, like a therapeutic song to our souls by the prophet Isaiah who wrote over 700 years before the Birth of Jesus Christ:

Israel’s Only Savior

43 But now thus says the Lord,

mhe who created you, O Jacob,

he who formed you, O Israel:

n“Fear not, for I have redeemed you;

oI have called you by name, you are mine.

2  pWhen you pass through the waters, I will be with you;

and through the rivers, they shall not overwhelm you;

pwhen you walk through fire qyou shall not be burned,

and the flame shall not consume you.

3  For rI am the Lord your God,

the Holy One of Israel, your Savior.

sI give Egypt as your ransom,

Cush and tSeba in exchange for you.

4  Because you are precious in my eyes,

and honored, and I love you,

I give men in return for you,

peoples in exchange for your life.

5  uFear not, for I am with you;

vI will bring your offspring from the east,

and from the west I will gather you.

6  I will say to the north, Give up,

and to the south, Do not withhold;

bring wmy sons from afar

and wmy daughters from the end of the earth,

7  everyone who is called by my name,

whom I created for my glory,

whom I formed and made.”

8  Bring out xthe people who are blind, yet have eyes,

who are deaf, yet have ears!

yAll the nations gather together,

and the peoples assemble.

Who among them can declare this,

and show us the former things?

Let them bring their witnesses to prove them right,

and let them hear and say, It is true.

10  z“You are my witnesses,” declares the Lord,

“and amy servant whom I have chosen,

that you may know and believe me

and understand that I am he.

bBefore me no god was formed,

nor shall there be any after me.

11  cI, I am the Lord,

and besides me there is no savior.

12  I declared and saved and proclaimed,

when there was no strange god among you;

and zyou are my witnesses,” declares the Lord, “and I am God.

13  Also dhenceforth I am he;

there is none who can deliver from my hand;

I work, and who can turn it back?”

14  Thus says the Lord,

your Redeemer, the Holy One of Israel:

e“For your sake I send to Babylon

and fbring them all down as fugitives,

geven the Chaldeans, in the ships in which they rejoice.

15  I am the Lord, your Holy One,

the Creator of Israel, your King.”

16  Thus says the Lord,

hwho makes a way in the sea,

a path in the mighty waters,

17  who ibrings forth chariot and horse,

army and warrior;

they lie down, they cannot rise,

jthey are extinguished, kquenched like a wick:

18  l“Remember not the former things,

nor consider the things of old.

19  mBehold, I am doing a new thing;

now it springs forth, do you not perceive it?

nI will make a way in the wilderness

oand rivers in the desert.

20  The wild beasts will honor me,

pthe jackals and the ostriches,

qfor I give water in the wilderness,

rivers in the desert,

to give drink to my chosen people,

21 the people whom I formed for myself

rthat they might declare my praise.

22  “Yet you did not call upon me, O Jacob;

but syou have been weary of me, O Israel!

23  tYou have not brought me your sheep for burnt offerings,

or honored me with your sacrifices.

I have not burdened you with offerings,

sor wearied you with frankincense.

24  You have not bought me sweet cane with money,

or satisfied me with the fat of your sacrifices.

But you have burdened me with your sins;

you have wearied me with your iniquities.

25  “I, I am he

uwho blots out vyour transgressions for my own sake,

and I will not remember your sins.

26  Put me in remembrance; wlet us argue together;

set forth your case, that you may be proved right.

27  xYour first father sinned,

and yyour mediators transgressed against me.

28  Therefore zI will profane the princes of the sanctuary,

and adeliver Jacob to utter destruction

and Israel to reviling. 

He has blotted out our transgressions for HIS name's sake and He has Mercy on us for His Joy and He Loves us for HIS Glory.  Oh How He loves us!!! God is so good! 
We can and should find so much peace & joy in these despite what the day might bring.  We press on toward the Cross :) & His Future Glory (Romans 8)

With Love your Sister in Him,

Katherine :) 

To Be Beautiful: From the Inside Out

I desire so desperately sometimes to be beautiful-- the Lord delights in our beauty not in us but that which radiate through HIM in Him and by Him ultimately for Him.
Take today for example,
I woke-up rolled out of bed and went to meet my mom at her work to get her car keys.  My hair was a mess, I was dressed in sweats, my face is all broken-out in acne, I havent showered in a day, and I have on absoltutely no make-up to hide my tiredness behind.  ugh yuck I prayed to God to remind me of my beauty in Him and to convict me of my selfish and vain thoughts/feelings.  As the day progressed I felt worse, I did laundry, cleaned the house-- got all sweaty-- how imperfect we human beings are-- yet we are made in His image and made for His glory.  Just now in my alone time with Him He has spoken gently to my frail, pitiful,  and depraved human heart. 


He is whispering to me that I am beautiful.. that He delights in the Glory I bring Him.  Oh how He loves me.  Psalm 45 is beautiful:

International Version (NIV)

Psalm 45

Psalm 45^[a]

    For the director of music. To the tune of “Lilies.” Of the Sons of Korah. A maskil.^[b] A wedding song.  ¹ My heart is stirred by a noble theme
   as I recite my verses for the king;
   my tongue is the pen of a skillful writer.
 ² You are the most excellent of men
   and your lips have been anointed with grace,
   since God has blessed you forever.
 ³ Gird your sword on your side, you mighty one;
   clothe yourself with splendor and majesty.
⁴ In your majesty ride forth victoriously
   in the cause of truth, humility and justice;
   let your right hand achieve awesome deeds.
⁵ Let your sharp arrows pierce the hearts of the king’s enemies;
   let the nations fall beneath your feet.
⁶ Your throne, O God,^[c] will last for ever and ever;
   a scepter of justice will be the scepter of your kingdom.
⁷ You love righteousness and hate wickedness;
   therefore God, your God, has set you above your companions
   by anointing you with the oil of joy.
⁸ All your robes are fragrant with myrrh and aloes and cassia;
   from palaces adorned with ivory
   the music of the strings makes you glad.
⁹ Daughters of kings are among your honored women;
   at your right hand is the royal bride in gold of Ophir.
 ¹⁰ Listen, daughter, and pay careful attention:
   Forget your people and your father’s house.
¹¹ Let the king be enthralled by your beauty;
   honor him, for he is your lord.
¹² The city of Tyre will come with a gift,^[d]
   people of wealth will seek your favor.
¹³ All glorious is the princess within her chamber;
   her gown is interwoven with gold.
¹⁴ In embroidered garments she is led to the king;
   her virgin companions follow her—
   those brought to be with her.
¹⁵ Led in with joy and gladness,
   they enter the palace of the king.
 ¹⁶ Your sons will take the place of your fathers;
   you will make them princes throughout the land.
 ¹⁷ I will perpetuate your memory through all generations;
   therefore the nations will praise you for ever and ever.

"  

My soul delights in verse 10 & 11.  "He is ENTHRALLED BY OUR BEAUTY" in HIM, IN HIS IMAGE which brings Him Glory.  :) :)

My soul radiates!!
God is our Father who finds us gorgeous as His daughter


Rest well tonight my friends and delight in the Beauty of GLORIFYING Him in word, deed, action & truth.  From the inside-- out.
Love,
Katherine

5 Steps to Demolishing Strongholds

Beth Moore's 5 steps to defeating what is keeping you from the Lord.

1. Recognize the Captor
2. Stand in agreement with God
3. Tear down the lies
4. Put up the Truth
5. Bow thought to truth

BROKEN FREE

It is time to change the name of my blog.  I am on Chapter 40 of Beth Moore's Breaking Free out of 47, and I have found Freedom from captivity in satan's strongholds have become CAPTIVE in CHRIST.  His love and His Life.. which is the ultimate freedom.  He has redeemed me, lead me through the desert, and has given me a NEW SPIRIT. Ezekiel 36:

 ²⁴ “‘For I will take you out of the nations; I will gather you from all the countries and bring you back into your own land. ²⁵ I will sprinkle clean water on you, and you will be clean; I will cleanse you from all your impurities and from all your idols. ²⁶ I will give you a new heart and put a new spirit in you; I will remove from you your heart of stone and give you a heart of flesh. ²⁷ And I will put my Spirit in you and move you to follow my decrees and be careful to keep my laws. ²⁸ Then you will live in the land I gave your ancestors; you will be my people, and I will be your God. ²⁹ I will save you from all your uncleanness. I will call for the grain and make it plentiful and will not bring famine upon you. ³⁰ I will increase the fruit of the trees and the crops of the field, so that you will no longer suffer disgrace among the nations because of famine. ³¹ Then you will remember your evil ways and wicked deeds, and you will loathe yourselves for your sins and detestable practices. ³² I want you to know that I am not doing this for your sake, declares the Sovereign LORD. Be ashamed and disgraced for your conduct, people of Israel!

  His discipline and guidance has brought me through and will continue to.  I turn into a new chapter of my life and continue in the process of Sanctification.  Death has lost its power.  I know that I will endure many more trials and struggle but am better equipped to face them & when they do, the Lord has taught me to cling to Him and His Salvation!!!!!!!!!

 It all comes down to one thing: DO WE LOVE GOD & JESUS CHRIST MORE THAN ANYTHING ELSE?? ...... the battle of the idols of the heart---seeking other things to feel the desperate void that I have for my selfish happiness and seeking love and satisfaction in an idol or stronghold of this world due to my own insecurities.  As Beth Moore states it is UNBELIEF that ultimately feeds this cycle--- unbelief that God truly, truly loves me and believing that His love is ALL that I need and that He alone will satisfy.  My idolatrous heart seeks out whatever it can to feel this "unmet" love or need which is rooted deep in my heart by pride & selfishness and a desire to be happy. 
It is a vicious and blinding cycle that has kept me double-bound in guilt, desire for love & selfishness. 
The idols that have kept me "captive":

IDOL #1
Love and affection from others-- a desire for approval and acceptance
    -- ultimately my disbelief that God's love is enough has lead me to seek love and approval from others including men, parents, roommates, friends, etc. 
- when my "needs" of love and approval remained unmet or empty, I was left feeling alone or unworthy of love.-- undeserving.  Thus causing me to dwell in self-pity and leaving me paralyzed in my ability to LOVE OTHERS as myself and fully in the way that the Lord commands. 
GOD'S ANSWER:
He does love me.  He loves me soooo so so much.  (and you) and that is enough.  that's it.  all there is to it.  problem solved by Christ's death on the Cross & His AMAZING GRACE.


IDOL #2
Food and comfort.  turning to food, comfort (even a nap) or alcohol to satisfy the emptiness inside.  But the feeling fades and often leads to feelings of guilt-- I have failed to retrain once again.
ANSWER:
turning to the Living water to fulfill my soul.  He fills me up.  All that I need.  my comfort, my fortress, my strength.

Isaiah 44:3 For I will pour water on the thirsty land, and streams on the dry ground; I will pour out my Spirit on your offspring, and my blessing on your descendants.
Isaiah 55:1 "Come, all you who are thirsty, come to the waters; and you who have no money, come, buy and eat! Come, buy wine and milk without money and without cost.

John 7
 ³⁷ On the last and greatest day of the festival, Jesus stood and said in a loud voice, “Let anyone who is thirsty come to me and drink. ³⁸ Whoever believes in me, as Scripture has said, rivers of living water will flow from within them.”^{[c] 39} By this he meant the Spirit, whom those who believed in him were later to receive. Up to that time the Spirit had not been given, since Jesus had not yet been glorified.

IDOL #3
Appearance-- if I can put a front then I have together.  vanity.
ANSWER:
the more flawed I am- the more He is glorified.  His power rests best in my weakness.  2 Corinthians 12:9
Proverbs 31:
 Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting;
   but a woman who fears the LORD is to be praised.
³¹ Honor her for all that her hands have done,
   and let her works bring her praise at the city gate.
Praise GOD. Oh how He loves us.
~*~*~**~*~*~**~*~**~*~**~*~*~*~*~**~*~*~**~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~**~*~*~**~*~*~

Isaiah 61

The Year of the LORD’s Favor

 ¹ The Spirit of the Sovereign LORD is on me,
   because the LORD has anointed me
   to proclaim good news to the poor. He has sent me to bind up the brokenhearted,
   to proclaim freedom for the captives
   and release from darkness for the prisoners,^[a]
2 to proclaim the year of the LORD’s favor
   and the day of vengeance of our God,
to comfort all who mourn,
 ³ and provide for those who grieve in Zion— to bestow on them a crown of beauty
   instead of ashes,
the oil of joy
   instead of mourning,
and a garment of praise
   instead of a spirit of despair.

---

---

the problem of the “co-dependent,” -from:by David Powlison

Idols of the Heart

and “Vanity Fair”

It is obvious that if idolatry is

then repentant faith in Christ is the solution. This stands

in marked contrast to the solutions proffered in the co-dependency

literature, whether secular or glossed with Christian

phrases. That literature often perceptively describes the patterns

of dysfunctional idols—addictions and dependencies—

which curse and enslave people. The idols which enslave the

rescuer or the compulsive drinker do not work very well for

them.

The literature may even use “idolatry” as a metaphor,

without meaning “idolatry against God, therefore repentance.”

The solution, without exception, is to offer different and

presumably more workable idols, rather than repentance unto

the Bible’s Christ! Secularistic therapies teach people

eufunctional idols, idols which do “work” for people and

“bless” them with temporarily happy lives (Psalm 73).

So, for example, self-esteem is nurtured as the replacement

for trying to please unpleasable others, rather than esteem for

the Lamb who was slain for me, a sinner. Acceptance and love

from new significant others, starting with the therapist, create

successful versions of the fear of man and trust in man rather

than teaching essential trust in God. Self-trust and self-confidence

are boosted as I am taught to set expectations for myself

to which I can attain. The fruit looks good but is fundamentally

counterfeit. Believers in false gospels are sometimes allowed

to flourish temporarily.

Therapy systems without repentance at their core leave the

idol system intact. They simply rehabilitate and rebuild fundamental

godlessness to function more successfully.

The Bible’s idolatry motif diagnoses the ultimately selfdestructive

basis on which happy, healthy, and confident

people build their lives (eufunctional idols), just as perceptively

as it diagnoses unhappy people, who are more obviously

and immediately self-destructive (dysfunctional idols).